No trouble

By Michel Danielson

Do you believe you have many troubles?

Such as: … And: … And: …Or: … And also: …

Yes, I let you to finish. Troubles are yours, not mine. You know them, not I.

Maybe you even find difficult to list? Maybe you think your troubles are countless? And especially heavy? So heavy that you stagger under their burden? It’ impossible to bear?

Are you proud of your troubles? Why not? Huge problems are not for everybody. They are for few people only. Very important ones. As, of course, you are.

Bravo! Interesting, amazing point of view. But dangerous. Once, it was mine, also. I hardly survived it.

Or you are afraid of your troubles? Or you are tired? Depressed? I was. So afraid, so tired, so depressed.

But, do you really know your troubles? I mean real ones?

Stupid, superfluous question? Your problems are always with you. They are your close, intimate, inseparable companion. You live with them, you love with them, you eat with them, you work with them, you sleep with them, you entertain with them. Or can’t live, love, eat, work, sleep, entertain because of them. How you wouldn’t know them? Yet, you probably don’t.

It looks strange, I admit. But it can be true. The truth is often stranger than fiction, because we get used to consider the fiction as the truth.

I also thought I knew my problems very well. It was my great delusion. I was simply to blind to understand what is going on with me. I didn’t realize what I was doing.

However, I diligently produced my plights, often from nothing or almost nothing. I spread them everywhere. I found them on every corner. I simply invented troubles or badly exaggerated some normal, everyday difficulties. Every trifle was a welcome cause.

Why I did that? Why I made the hell of my own life?

Because of my arrogance, that’s the cruel answer.

I was my biggest, full size trouble. On every footstep I stumbled on myself. I crashed with my vanity, again and again.

I eventually understood it.

It was bewildering discovery. It was huge relief.

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